Im not sure how much I will write, how much I will read, and how much I will care about this blog in a week or two. But I am going to make the attempt to use this as a dedication to myself and to help me see how beautiful, painful, and wonderful my life really is. I need to figure out who I am and what I want out of life... and i guess just to throw myself out there. Currently I am in a strange place in my life. I am at a point in which the people around me are changing their minds and life, and therefore changing my own life. I am at a point in which I am going to have to get by more on my own and learn how to be comfortable in my own skin. I am at a point of no return. I am at the point where Im terrified of the future... and this has never happened before.
I am supposed to head down to my hometown of San Diego tomorrow and face the thing that is changing it all... my relationship. Im not very good with big changes, even if they really do need to happen. I am a person that likes a plan and stability and when that gets blown out of the water I cry, throw up, don't sleep, and over think everything. Now its time for me to start embracing this change in my life and learn to see the beauty in this breakdown. I hope I can find it soon.
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